My husband of 12 years and 5 kids doesn’t come home for days and days. Excuses are he is tired, he too broke, didn’t have gas money to get home, was mad, said I would bitch~ I think I am real patient. I wash our clothes by hand in the sink, haven’t had a washer in over 4 years now~ we can afford one he just won’t buy one. He washes his clothes at the laundromat. We have one vehicle, he uses. We live out in the country. All my friends have disappeared over the years. I ‘ve let myself go really bad~ as in he won’t make time to watch the kids or allow me any money to go to the dentist. I had an online company I created myself, I loaned him all the money that came in to pay off his very many tickets, bail him out of jail, pay the utilities and the mortgage~ I never put any money back into my company~ it eventually went under while I was pregnant with our 5th child. During that time, I found out at a dr appt I had syphilis from him. He said he had been with 100′s of prostitutes over the years. I worried the whole pregnancy for the baby’s safety about congenital syphilis. I haven’t left because I have no where to go other than to a shelter. We have 5 children. 2 of which are special learners, autistic, one has a birth injury and another has to have titers checked reg. I homeschool so I am able to spend as much time as needed on subjects, they are never ‘labeled or judged”. I feel like I may ruin their lives, if I cannot support the 5 of them. I hate that we will have to give up their Christian homeschool and the home I paid all but 2 mortgage payments on so far because he cannot grow up. He says all men do this about not coming home, he says all men cheat. He says I overreact. He says he won’t do it again and does it again. I don’t want to throw 13 yrs away, I don’t want to screw up the kids lives but I can’t take this anymore. He doesn’t do drugs and drink, but I found beer in his car and condoms. I paid for his syphilis treatments. He said the condoms came from the CDC when I made him go get tested. He did this stuff to his first wife and kids, no I didn’t break them up, they were broken up long before I came along. He is 18 years older than I am, Hispanic, old fashioned, stubborn and blames EVERYTHING on me, ever

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Hello everyone, this post is not a question, but feel free to leave comments and i’d appreciate it. i will tell you exactly what happened to me and hopefully my lesson in life be a guidance to some of you reading this.

I arrived in California, alone… since my ‘life’ is here now… i had to start everything from scratch. my family is not here, and i dont even have a single friend. yes i have officemates but they are like 15 to 20 years older than me. I’m 26 by the way.

a year had passed, i was able to save a lot of money… i work a white collar job which i really love. i bought everything that i needed, from fancy cars to nice clothes, nice laptops everything is nice. but just like every man, there’s some thing missing with my life… i need a girl.

im a small guy… i’m only 5’0′, but i would say i have an okay look. not a hottie but a fair normal guy walking in the street. i then tried all means to get this ‘special’ someone, hoping i can find her.

I tried online, from Yahoo! Personals, e-harmony, match.com, yes i paid these subscriptions after not getting a girl from free ones like okcupid, plentyoffish and the like. prolly my height scares all these ‘single’ ladies, or maybe my picture. but heck, life must go on.

i joined religious organizations, private organizations and some public organizations… i tried volunteering as well… i enjoyed them for a while, but never still found my match.

to my loneliness, i went to the city so i will be surrounded by billions of people acting busy with their lives… till the night falls… at the end of the road i see sparkling lights… voila… a gentleman’s club.

i went in… and here… i felt like i exist again… girls smile at you… girls talk to you… as if nothing is wrong with me. they wink at you, and making you feel that you’re wanted.

i enjoyed myself… brought out my money, gave her this.. gave her that… goes to atm… withdraw… give money to this girl give money to that one.

i spent a lot… i then realized that that’s the only thing that i’m missing in my life… and i said heck.. money is just money… i need to be happy…

but all of a suddenly, lightning struck me, this girl that went up the stage is so damn gorgeous… she made the center stage busy, when men saw her, everyone just moved in the stage to tip her… she’s the prettiest girl in the club.

me, being in a way kind of insecure, coz around that stage are much more bigger and handsome men… this girl chose to go to me inspite of me giving very little tip to her… she showed me, interest.

after her show… we talked for 2 hours and 30 minutes… i told her to go and do her thing i dont want to get in the way of her job… but then she said no… she’s happy talking to me.

as we were talking, she was shivering… the club is quite cold for people wearing only their undies, since i respect this girl and never got a dance with her, i removed my jacket and covered her and told her she looks better with clothes. she appreciated all those respect. at the end of that 2 hours and 30 mins conversation… she gave me her phone number and her real name.

2 weeks later.. i cant help myself but to see her again… i went to the club and she spent 3 hours this time just talking to me, and before that talk had ended, we agreed to go for a date.

a week had passed, i asked her out… she sorta declined, telling me she’s busy and stuff… so i gave her another week and asked again, and she gave in.

so the day of the date had come… she is late. 9 minutes late. its alright, no big deal. so we sat… but 49 minutes later her phone beeped and vibrated. she read it… a message from her sister… her sister said she had to pick her up coz the ballet instructor left since there’s very few students that day. needless to say, our 1st date ended in 49 minutes, fastest in the history of man kind.

as i was driving home so pissed of what had happened, she texted me saying, “thank you for the dinner, i had a great time xoxo”

i replied by saying i hope we could repeat it again, and i hope it would be longer next time.. and she responded “of course =)”

i kept my hopes. she gave me hope.

i feel releaved… i gave it a week… before asking her out, but on that 1 week period i did see to it that i have to text atleast ones in 2 days to keep the fire burning and wont make me be like so clingy.

so i texted her again, and this time, i asked her if i’m bugging her, she said she’s actually having her nails done. fine, so i just went straight to the point.. i asked her out. she gave me reasons why she cannot go, its coz she’s visitng her mom and she will have to work on this day and that day.

i replied, telling her, well, i think you’re free this day coz she didnt mention it, or whenever when she’s free, i’m cool, just let me know and i’ll be glad to have another date with her.

she didnt reply since.

right now, my world is
right now, my world is back to where it was… i’m single again… and i’m alone.

i learned something with this life… never trust a stripper… or better yet, never love a stripper… no matter how nice they are… no matter how sincere they maybe…

save yourself from heartaches… i just dont want you to experience what i experienced… its sad… its disappointing… it hurts.

so goodluck to you whoever is reading this… and i hope you found some lesson in life with this thing that i shared… i wish you all the luck in this world… but just remember one thing…

dont ever trust and love a stripper. they only bring pain.